Tuesday, September 25, 2007
Friday, September 21, 2007
Seizure Fighting Robots
The blood mobile...
...The blood mobile came to work today. I never miss a chance to give blood. I don't particularly like needles but I feel it is my civil duty. Besides there is something mildly erotic about thinking of someone else living of your own blood...
Mildly creepy may be a better phrase
...In any case I have 2 poptarts and a can of Mello Yello for breakfast, and head on over to get stuck and hopefully dodge 30 mins of work for a good cause. Everything goes smoothly, they stick me and I bleed a pint and then they crimp the hose. After they seal the bag up they have to fill these little vials for what I assume are testing purposes. As the nurse ( a large 35 year old mail singing along with the country on the radio) begins filling the vials my field of vision begins to retreat. I look to him and say "I'm about to fall out." He responds with a smile and continues filling hoses...
From this point on the story was told to me by the nurses
...The next thing he knows I'm having seizures and attempting to swallow my tongue. All I can remember is laying my head back and thinkin' "I hope I wake back up." Well I did but there was a horrible screeching noise, lots of vibration, and 3 people I didn't know trying to hold down my arm to remove a needle. My totally awesome imagination kicks in and suddenly I think I'm being probed by space aliens trying to steal my Adam( I just finished bioshock sunday) So I respond in the only appropriate manner. I sucker punch the nurse, or at least I would have had I not stopped just shy of her face for realizing she was not an alien and I was not in a space ship or genetically mutated...
To end the nurses were all freakin out like woah, the cut my arm up pretty bad trying to get the needle out as I was seizuring. I just laughed and told them people normally have to pay good money to see space aliens, and got to for free.
...The blood mobile came to work today. I never miss a chance to give blood. I don't particularly like needles but I feel it is my civil duty. Besides there is something mildly erotic about thinking of someone else living of your own blood...
Mildly creepy may be a better phrase
...In any case I have 2 poptarts and a can of Mello Yello for breakfast, and head on over to get stuck and hopefully dodge 30 mins of work for a good cause. Everything goes smoothly, they stick me and I bleed a pint and then they crimp the hose. After they seal the bag up they have to fill these little vials for what I assume are testing purposes. As the nurse ( a large 35 year old mail singing along with the country on the radio) begins filling the vials my field of vision begins to retreat. I look to him and say "I'm about to fall out." He responds with a smile and continues filling hoses...
From this point on the story was told to me by the nurses
...The next thing he knows I'm having seizures and attempting to swallow my tongue. All I can remember is laying my head back and thinkin' "I hope I wake back up." Well I did but there was a horrible screeching noise, lots of vibration, and 3 people I didn't know trying to hold down my arm to remove a needle. My totally awesome imagination kicks in and suddenly I think I'm being probed by space aliens trying to steal my Adam( I just finished bioshock sunday) So I respond in the only appropriate manner. I sucker punch the nurse, or at least I would have had I not stopped just shy of her face for realizing she was not an alien and I was not in a space ship or genetically mutated...
To end the nurses were all freakin out like woah, the cut my arm up pretty bad trying to get the needle out as I was seizuring. I just laughed and told them people normally have to pay good money to see space aliens, and got to for free.
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
22
Sept 6 2007 (yea I know a comma goes in there somewhere.) is a day that will live in the minds of the world for years to come. It was the day I turned 22. In fact CNN reporters captured sentiments from around the globe.
Xianghu Tsu of Bejing, China had this to say. "Zac was born in the year of the Ox! No child in my home will be born under any different sign."
Pierre Ricard of Paris, France also had an opinion. "Generally I do not like Americans, they are loud, rude, and generally uncaring, Zac is all these things and more! I love him!"
Rachel Sander of England wrote in. "I used to dream at night of a cure for cancer, then I met Zac."
I'd like to think I'm as great as a cure for cancer, and I probably am and then some, but that would be conceited right? So instead of gloating about the sheer amount of awesome contained in just my left big toe I will instead dedicate this post to the people who make me... me.
Dad: I spent 16 years of my life swearing I would not grow up to be the man that raised me, 6 years later I have become that man. The man that never settles for a "half-ass" job. The man who works hard even when those around him don't. The man whose words and tone can be more sharp than any blade. Looking back it scares me to think that I ever wanted to be anything different. Thanks Dad, you were stern, and while you've always been short of patience, you never left it to question how much you loved me.
Mom: Its been 22 years since you introduced me to this crazy place called Earth. You have used the last 22 years of your life serving and caring for me. You nurtured me when I was sick. You helped me to realize that no matter how many times some one stabs you in the back you should get back up and help them in any way possible. You taught me that there is much more to life than money, fame, and power. No matter how little you had, you always said "at least you had me." One day mother it will be my turn to take care of you, and I only hope that I give as much of myself to you as you have given to me.
Jack: You have been my best friend for the last 6 years, you have taught me countless things. Both, things I should not do, and ones that I would have been better off having done. You've shown me what its like to almost lose someone to the "real world" and why you should never give up fighting for a friend who needs help. you taught me how to laugh when its not at someone else's expense. You have be a key component in fighting the evil beast of naivety and for that I want to say 4F!
Family: My entire family from my smallest cousin to my oldest Aunt, my god how you have supported me. You praise me in everything I do, unless of course it is total bullshit in which case you have always let me know. In much the same manner as described in the previous sentence =P . If I was a spaceship that ran on love I could totally use you guys to make it to the far reaches of space. Horribly cliche and corny but totally true.
Everyone else: For me to write a paragraph about every significant person in my life would take far to much time. Everyone I have ever met has shaped who I am today, and who I will be in the future. I am content with myself up to this point, so thank you! but by god if I'm ever dissatisfied with myself I'm coming for all of you!
phew..
Readers(if there are any) don't worry after this post all others will revert back to the typical "I'm totally awesome at being awesome while being awesomepanawsome" format.
Xianghu Tsu of Bejing, China had this to say. "Zac was born in the year of the Ox! No child in my home will be born under any different sign."
Pierre Ricard of Paris, France also had an opinion. "Generally I do not like Americans, they are loud, rude, and generally uncaring, Zac is all these things and more! I love him!"
Rachel Sander of England wrote in. "I used to dream at night of a cure for cancer, then I met Zac."
I'd like to think I'm as great as a cure for cancer, and I probably am and then some, but that would be conceited right? So instead of gloating about the sheer amount of awesome contained in just my left big toe I will instead dedicate this post to the people who make me... me.
Dad: I spent 16 years of my life swearing I would not grow up to be the man that raised me, 6 years later I have become that man. The man that never settles for a "half-ass" job. The man who works hard even when those around him don't. The man whose words and tone can be more sharp than any blade. Looking back it scares me to think that I ever wanted to be anything different. Thanks Dad, you were stern, and while you've always been short of patience, you never left it to question how much you loved me.
Mom: Its been 22 years since you introduced me to this crazy place called Earth. You have used the last 22 years of your life serving and caring for me. You nurtured me when I was sick. You helped me to realize that no matter how many times some one stabs you in the back you should get back up and help them in any way possible. You taught me that there is much more to life than money, fame, and power. No matter how little you had, you always said "at least you had me." One day mother it will be my turn to take care of you, and I only hope that I give as much of myself to you as you have given to me.
Jack: You have been my best friend for the last 6 years, you have taught me countless things. Both, things I should not do, and ones that I would have been better off having done. You've shown me what its like to almost lose someone to the "real world" and why you should never give up fighting for a friend who needs help. you taught me how to laugh when its not at someone else's expense. You have be a key component in fighting the evil beast of naivety and for that I want to say 4F!
Family: My entire family from my smallest cousin to my oldest Aunt, my god how you have supported me. You praise me in everything I do, unless of course it is total bullshit in which case you have always let me know. In much the same manner as described in the previous sentence =P . If I was a spaceship that ran on love I could totally use you guys to make it to the far reaches of space. Horribly cliche and corny but totally true.
Everyone else: For me to write a paragraph about every significant person in my life would take far to much time. Everyone I have ever met has shaped who I am today, and who I will be in the future. I am content with myself up to this point, so thank you! but by god if I'm ever dissatisfied with myself I'm coming for all of you!
phew..
Readers(if there are any) don't worry after this post all others will revert back to the typical "I'm totally awesome at being awesome while being awesomepanawsome" format.
Wednesday, July 25, 2007
Barrack FTW!
“the notion that somehow not talking to countries is punishment to them — which has been the guiding diplomatic principle of this administration — is ridiculous.”
~Barrack Obama
Totally a true story.
~Barrack Obama
Totally a true story.
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
YouTube Debates
Firstly for anyone that missed the debates last night, you can find all the questions and their responses at www.youtube.com/debates.
Last night the democratic candidates hung out with Anderson Cooper @ cnn and got their debate on. This is nothing new candidates have been debating in the public news forum for years, however this year the questions did not come from a panel of voters or a journalist. This year the people asking the questions were the users of youtube, and boy did they ask some tough ones. Here is the video the event opened with.
This video does a good job of setting the tone for most of the other questions asked through out the night. The questions were arranged in groups depending on their area of concern. Out of 3000 submissions 39 were chosen and shown. One video shows a man singing a song about taxes, while another shows an uninsured breast cancer patient asking politicians how they feel about her lack of insurance greatly decreasing her odds of survival. Even the religious community made it in on this one with a video that has a an African American Reverend asking candidates how they feel about religious beliefs and their place in politics(The reverend was against religion in politics.)
The best question of the night(IMO) was this one.
This question did a great job of showing that nothing about political debates has changed. The problem of political debates is two sided. The first being the nature of the questions, which with the advent of the youtube debates has been changed. The other issue is that politicians will flat out refuse to answer direct questions no matter how insignificant they may be. Out of all the candidates only 3 answered the entire question. John Edwards, Barrack Obama, and that one guy that made fun of the other dudes wife.
I find it very troubling that I live in a time where the people who lead my country cannot complete a social learning activity that 2nd graders have been able to breeze through since the words social learning activity existed.
Despite that rant I do want to give major props to Anderson Cooper, he did a very good job of not kissing everyone's ass and trying to make them stay on topic.
Last night the democratic candidates hung out with Anderson Cooper @ cnn and got their debate on. This is nothing new candidates have been debating in the public news forum for years, however this year the questions did not come from a panel of voters or a journalist. This year the people asking the questions were the users of youtube, and boy did they ask some tough ones. Here is the video the event opened with.
This video does a good job of setting the tone for most of the other questions asked through out the night. The questions were arranged in groups depending on their area of concern. Out of 3000 submissions 39 were chosen and shown. One video shows a man singing a song about taxes, while another shows an uninsured breast cancer patient asking politicians how they feel about her lack of insurance greatly decreasing her odds of survival. Even the religious community made it in on this one with a video that has a an African American Reverend asking candidates how they feel about religious beliefs and their place in politics(The reverend was against religion in politics.)
The best question of the night(IMO) was this one.
This question did a great job of showing that nothing about political debates has changed. The problem of political debates is two sided. The first being the nature of the questions, which with the advent of the youtube debates has been changed. The other issue is that politicians will flat out refuse to answer direct questions no matter how insignificant they may be. Out of all the candidates only 3 answered the entire question. John Edwards, Barrack Obama, and that one guy that made fun of the other dudes wife.
I find it very troubling that I live in a time where the people who lead my country cannot complete a social learning activity that 2nd graders have been able to breeze through since the words social learning activity existed.
Despite that rant I do want to give major props to Anderson Cooper, he did a very good job of not kissing everyone's ass and trying to make them stay on topic.
Friday, July 20, 2007
Thursday, July 19, 2007
A Handful of Packages!
In life everyone has things that get under their skin, pet peeves if you will. Some times though People encounter an action in life that goes beyond the scope of the word pet peeve. The only words that are fit to describe these instances are castastrophical annoyance. I'm pretty sure one of those two isn't a real word. The annoyance is so intense that a non existing word is the only thing that can describe it.
Today I want to take a moment to thank Taco Bell for being the biggest castastrophical annoyance in my life.
Taco Bell has served me faithfully through the years. They have provided vital nutrients that my body needs to transverse this wild urban jungle. Never have they been short on grade ? meat when I need it. Their fountains have never left my mouth wanting for the most awesome taste of Mountain Dew. When I needed lettuce the most, they never lettuced me down...
lettuced me down... jesus...What has the interwebzzz come too.
I could continue on with the list of things that Taco Bell has contributed to my life, but I won't. What I will do is talk about the one massive ulcer that mars every existing Taco Bell in the known universe. Insufficient mild sauce supplification(also not a real word) when going through the drive thru. At first I thought it only a temporary nuisance, but then I noticed that at every Taco Bell the story was the same. Only one packet per item ordered. Given my extensive history in the fast casual dining world I figured that this one packet practice was a money saving technique devised by the Taco Bell Desk Jockeys back at corporate.
So then I began asking for extra packets, still only one per item. I even went as far as to specify the exact number of packets I wanted. Still only one.
Now when I stop by for a 4th meal during the wee hours of the morning I use ridiculous synonyms for a lot or big such as Ginormous, Collosal, or "Enough to kill a horse".
To this day I still only receive one packet per item.
Like I said catastrophical annoyance.
Today I want to take a moment to thank Taco Bell for being the biggest castastrophical annoyance in my life.
Taco Bell has served me faithfully through the years. They have provided vital nutrients that my body needs to transverse this wild urban jungle. Never have they been short on grade ? meat when I need it. Their fountains have never left my mouth wanting for the most awesome taste of Mountain Dew. When I needed lettuce the most, they never lettuced me down...
lettuced me down... jesus...What has the interwebzzz come too.
I could continue on with the list of things that Taco Bell has contributed to my life, but I won't. What I will do is talk about the one massive ulcer that mars every existing Taco Bell in the known universe. Insufficient mild sauce supplification(also not a real word) when going through the drive thru. At first I thought it only a temporary nuisance, but then I noticed that at every Taco Bell the story was the same. Only one packet per item ordered. Given my extensive history in the fast casual dining world I figured that this one packet practice was a money saving technique devised by the Taco Bell Desk Jockeys back at corporate.
So then I began asking for extra packets, still only one per item. I even went as far as to specify the exact number of packets I wanted. Still only one.
Now when I stop by for a 4th meal during the wee hours of the morning I use ridiculous synonyms for a lot or big such as Ginormous, Collosal, or "Enough to kill a horse".
To this day I still only receive one packet per item.
Like I said catastrophical annoyance.
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Life and Death
Lately I think a lot about dying. I don't really think about how I'll die, I just hope it will be awesome. I think more about how I'll know if I'm happy when I die. Assuming that I don't die the instant I realize I'm about too, what will I look back on and be happy about.
Work is one of the major things that plague me, I work 40 hours a week. That leaves me 128 hours I sleep 8 hours a night. That leaves me with 72 hours of waking time. That means in a 7 day week I am only getting to actually LIVE 3 days... That is 156 days a year, which means I waste 200 days a year on work. How would I pay my bills and buy the things I wanted/need if I didn't have a job. How would I get my rockin new Wii and a new PC!? I most certainly need a new couch and a sweet HD TV! Then I think, what will all of those things mean to me as I'm dying; Will I be happy because I died with an HD TV, because I traded 200 days of my finite human life, for a TV, and 200 more for a new sofa and fridge?
I think the things that will make me happy as I die, are the people I have known, The places I have seen, and the way that I have lived. Knowing this I still lack the will power to break away from the "real world". I'm sure as I die, Ill regret that the most.
Work is one of the major things that plague me, I work 40 hours a week. That leaves me 128 hours I sleep 8 hours a night. That leaves me with 72 hours of waking time. That means in a 7 day week I am only getting to actually LIVE 3 days... That is 156 days a year, which means I waste 200 days a year on work. How would I pay my bills and buy the things I wanted/need if I didn't have a job. How would I get my rockin new Wii and a new PC!? I most certainly need a new couch and a sweet HD TV! Then I think, what will all of those things mean to me as I'm dying; Will I be happy because I died with an HD TV, because I traded 200 days of my finite human life, for a TV, and 200 more for a new sofa and fridge?
I think the things that will make me happy as I die, are the people I have known, The places I have seen, and the way that I have lived. Knowing this I still lack the will power to break away from the "real world". I'm sure as I die, Ill regret that the most.
Saturday, July 7, 2007
Music: Gym Class Heroes!
Just bought the CD for this band the other day. Definitely a worthy purchase.
Friday, July 6, 2007
Of Cubicles and Men
Some say that home is where the heart is. I say home is where you spend the majority of your waking hours. For me home is a beige 8x8 piece of space in the corporate offices of a fortune 400 company. To help others get to know me and who I am I thought it would be a good idea to show everyone one what kind of pad I live in.
We start the tour of my luxurious cubicle with a stunning display of duel displays! redundancy is a good thing in IT. As you can probably tell the picture was taken with the utmost privacy in mind. Notice the blurring of the screen, props to the photographer on this shot. One thing I wold like to point out here is the custom designed All American monitor stands. I know you are thinking those are just reams of paper but I assure you they most certainly are not!
Moving right along, more so to the left than the right really. This is actually the guest area. I use this anytime we have a new hire that needs a place to watch training videos. As is evident I furnish all new employees with some thinking putty and a water bottle. Also take note of the reports to the side. Its important for later.
We start the tour of my luxurious cubicle with a stunning display of duel displays! redundancy is a good thing in IT. As you can probably tell the picture was taken with the utmost privacy in mind. Notice the blurring of the screen, props to the photographer on this shot. One thing I wold like to point out here is the custom designed All American monitor stands. I know you are thinking those are just reams of paper but I assure you they most certainly are not!
Moving right along, more so to the left than the right really. This is actually the guest area. I use this anytime we have a new hire that needs a place to watch training videos. As is evident I furnish all new employees with some thinking putty and a water bottle. Also take note of the reports to the side. Its important for later.
As we continue further to the left we see my unwitting boss, posing for his web debut. One of the luxuries of working for such a large company is that every cube has 2 windows. One into the cube infront of it and one into the one behind it. This design is very reminiscent of the novel 1984, a favorite read of mine. My boss probably doesn't even know what a novel is.
A look beneath the window reveals many untouched reports and a book related to a project I am working on.
As we turn left once more we are greeted with my cubbies rec area. As you can see I have head phones for super jamming! A lightsaber used to settle interdepartmental disputes. Hygiene being very important to me I keep a minicow toothbrush holder. It reminds me of clean teeth through out the day. 
Sometimes I throw sweet parties, in my cube. We play some pretty awesome Jams. The fire chief says I can only have 3 people in the club...err my cube at a time but sometimes we break the law and squeeze in 5 or 6. Pretty Rockin.
Monday, July 2, 2007
Blunch: 7-2-07
Took these pics While on my lunch break today. This is a small park near where I am employed. I decided to hop on a small pig trail and came out next to this creek. Mud + dress shoes = Slippery!Click the for bigger versions. Taken with my LG.
Saturday, June 30, 2007
Blogger Virginity
So this is my first "real" blog entry. I am a corporate desk jockey and I oft times enjoy relaxing in my leather speaker chair and vegging out to some Katamari Damacy. I don't really know much about blogging so until I figure it out I'm not going to have any specific purpose or direction for this thing.
What I do know though, is that working on Saturday is a ritualistic brainwashing method used by the freemasons to enslave the working class. Supporting my theory below is a diagram retrieved directly from the freemason HQ.
As you can see in the diagram the freemasons are beaming Saturdayzz propoganda into our minds. The drool on a Saturday workers mouth long thought to be hangover related, is actually a well known side effect of brainwashing. Other side effects include but are not limited to, Thinking overtime is a good thing, successfully completing projects, meeting deadlines, and a lack of interwebz surfing. If you notice anyone suffering from these symptoms immediately inform the department of homeland security. They have been trying for years to find an effective means of mind control.
What I do know though, is that working on Saturday is a ritualistic brainwashing method used by the freemasons to enslave the working class. Supporting my theory below is a diagram retrieved directly from the freemason HQ.
As you can see in the diagram the freemasons are beaming Saturdayzz propoganda into our minds. The drool on a Saturday workers mouth long thought to be hangover related, is actually a well known side effect of brainwashing. Other side effects include but are not limited to, Thinking overtime is a good thing, successfully completing projects, meeting deadlines, and a lack of interwebz surfing. If you notice anyone suffering from these symptoms immediately inform the department of homeland security. They have been trying for years to find an effective means of mind control.
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